Thursday, July 16, 2009
my thoughts on... weddings.
Okay, you asked for it. Well, a few of you asked for it. That is, my thoughts on weddings. I'll try not to rant too much here. Basically, lots of my friends are either engaged or will soon become engaged or are already hitched with 10238747 kids (not really). So this is something I've thought a lot about. Not to mention I altered wedding gowns for about a year and have made gowns over the years for clients. I hesitate to write anything here because a lot of my friends read it and I don't want them to think that I am in any way putting down their wedding. With that said...a few of my thoughts on this subject. (And pleeeeease, no flaming. Otherwise this will get deleted and no more talk about weddings ever again. I promise. Sort of.) ;)
I used to work at a bridal shop when I was 18 altering wedding gowns. It was a great experience for me to work with people and learn how to alter a garment, as altering is completely different than sewing a garment from scratch. But it also was a bit of a rude awakening as I'd never really knew much about the bridal industry at this time. You see, I'm not what you'd call the type of girl who has been dreaming of her wedding day since she was 12. I love pretty dresses, don't get me wrong, but I always thought planning your own wedding before even having a man in the picture was pretty silly. (Not to mention my idea of the perfect wedding gown would change drastically over the years.) I still think it's pretty silly. I also think people get a little crazy when they do finally get engaged and start planning a wedding. As if it's the one day in your life that will make or break you. The fact is, it's not. It's one day. It's really just a party and meant so you and those you love can join together to celebrate a special day in your life. I never understood the brides who turn crazy over one day. I mean, where's the love? Isn't that why we have weddings in the first place, because two people love each other so much that they want to spend the rest of their lives together? And why does everyone feel they have to do all the little wedding things for the sake of tradition? What tradition? You mean the little traditions that date back to the 1960's? Who decided the bride's maids would pay for their own dresses? Who decided the parents of the bride would pay for the wedding? Why a diamond? Why spend thousands of dollars on one ring? And please tell me, why on earth do people spend tens of thousands of dollars on one day, ONE day out of their life?
Whoa... slow down Anna. I know, I'm getting a little out of hand here. Some of my friends just say I'm cynical (others tell me to embrace the inner cynicism, I prefer to embrace it). But honestly, I have to ask myself when so many people around me are getting hitched. What's the big deal? Of course I'm not stupid, I know getting married is a big deal. But a lot of it I just don't get. And as far as the dresses these days, most of them are garbage. You know when I walked into a bridal shop for the first time, I honestly thought they would all be made of silk. Wrong! Polyester more like. Silk almost doesn't exist unless you have your gown custom made or from a couture shop. What you will find is beading. Lots and lots of beading. And acetate. And lace. Oh lordy the lace. (Have I offended anyone yet?) Another thing (as I risk to further offend), why do bride's maids dresses all have to look like high school prom? Why???? And why do they all have to be matchy matchy?
The point is, why for the sake of tradition does everyone feel they need to follow the path and do as everyone else does? You know in the mid-19th century and long before that, it was quite common for brides to marry in their best dress and in many cases it was not white. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe Queen Victoria was the one who popularized the white gown. And although I am partial to a white wedding gown, there's nothing that says you must wear white otherwise you are less pure if you go for something less traditional than a white gown. Oh I could go on and on. But I'll save you. Now I don't want you to go away thinking I am a hateful woman who hates all things that have to do with weddings. I think a wedding can be a great time and I'm betting if I ever get married, it would be fun to plan. But getting stressed, spending lots of money and turning psycho are all things I think many brides can do without. And that my friends, is my little (yes little) rant on weddings. Now, take me to the kittens!